MINNEAPOLIS — Lose 15 pounds. Avoid fried food. Volunteer twice a week.
While those might all seem like healthy and ambitious goals on paper--they might not always be realistic and achievable, especially during a pandemic.
Restrictions still in place or common safety precautions due to COVID-19 may limit what's feasible. For example, not everyone might feel comfortable visiting a gym in-person. Many volunteer opportunities have been limited due to COVID as well.
Sarah Paper, a clinical psychologist with Allina Health, says this year it's important to curb your expectations without giving up hope.
"At first we were saying, ‘When [the pandemic is] over I’m going to, when it’s over I’m going to’ – and I think that we’ve come to that point now [where we have to ask] what can I do now? How can I get through now?" Paper said.
Here are some do's and don'ts she offers when setting resolutions.
DO START SMALL
"I always think of that book, 'Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff.'" Paper said. "So I think sometimes when we have to sweat the big stuff, and sweat it for a long time, we have to celebrate the small things and enjoy those and sometimes those add up to a medium or maybe a big thing in our lives."
DO MAKE A "DONE" LIST, INSTEAD OF A "TO-DO" LIST
Paper says one way to celebrate the small things is to make a "done" list, instead of a "to-do" list.
"Even like an old-fashioned calendar on the wall so that you’re always seeing it, not needing to open it up on your phone. And you write down one thing you did for yourself that day," said Paper. "So you write down – today I went for a 30 minute walk, or I tried a new fruit.
"And then you look at the calendar as a visual reminder like – I’m doing good things for myself, because it can be so easy to be caught up in the things we’re not doing or not achieving. All of the moments we’re not having."
DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS
"It's important for us to remember not to compare ourselves to other people and think, well, they have it worse so I shouldn’t be complaining."
Paper says focus on what you can control.
DO CELEBRATE THE GOOD, INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON AVOIDING THE BAD
"Instead of [saying] 'I’m not going to eat junk food!' That’s really hard to do, and it creates that opportunity for shame," Paper said. "And then we beat ourselves up over that, instead of build ourselves up. And when we feel better about ourselves, we make better choices."
DON'T TRY TO BE "THE BEST." SOMETIMES JUST "BETTER" IS OKAY.
"What can we do to make ourselves feel better or okay, or not feel as miserable. And that might be our goal for ourselves," she said. "Not 'I want to be happy,' or 'I don’t want to feel stressed,' but 'I don’t want to be as stressed.' Or 'I want to be able to manage my stress a little bit better.'"
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